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Still kickin'

Well, it's been a little while, but I thought I'd give a quick update on my state of mind and my state of play.

I've been playing a lot of PS2 lately, so I haven't really had time to play much poker. I think I've played about 4 SNGs since I last posted with disastrous results. I've been running cold lately and that's most likely contributed to my laissez-faire attitude regarding poker. However, tonight I'll give it a shot again and we'll see - I always like playing poker a lot more when I'm winning.

I've seriously started to doubt my ability to be a winning player. I don't have the time or the will to really invest in my growth as a player - I've read the books and don't feel like reading much more for the time being. I find myself somewhat burned out from the process of fully investing my every waking thought into poker as I did back this past summer and in the fall. My main concerns seem to stem from the fact that I win when I get good cards and lose when I get bad cards - this seems a lot like luck to me. If I need good cards to win, then how can I ever be a winning player? I tend to be pretty unlucky in marginal situations as well, so I'd rate my ability to win anything at slightly less than the most average of players out there.

Am I being too hard on myself? I don't know. For the time being, I'll keep playing PS2 and playing the occasional SNG and I'll see where that takes me. With work being far busier lately than it has been in the past little while, it definitely makes it harder for me to play poker. When I'm tired or run down, I find it difficult to gather up the will or brainpower needed to take on other players who are far more rested or "into" the game than I am.

Anyway, there are a sh*tload of reload offers out there and deposit bonuses as well for anyone who cares. I still haven't purchased a copy of PokerAce HUD so I've stayed away from limit play. All these little programs have made me lazy and stupid when playing limit and I fear that I need any edge I can get to win.

Basically, if anyone out there has been through a similar phase in their development as a poker player, I'd appreciate hearing about it. I need to know whether what I'm feeling is normal or whether I've just totally lost it (game-wise and sanity-wise) and should give up the game. Is it possible to balance family, work, poker and leisure? Please, let me know...

Have a great weekend everyone (if I don't write again this week...I may have some time tomorrow...)!

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