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Friday night: Damn you DQ!

I'm gonna have to blame the Dairy Queen blizzard I had on Friday for the horrific ass-kicking I got at the tables. Or maybe it was the three beers...or maybe I just suck!

Before I started playing Friday night, I was down 35 BB at $1/$2. I had about $85 in bonuses to clear at Absolute Poker and at $1/$2, that means an extra $15 or so for every hour that I multi-table.

My wife and I had a nice dinner - a gigantic pizza from Loblaws. I ate about half of it myself then sat back and watched The Stepford Wives. I got a stomach ache - I blame the pizza and not the movie (it's actually not that bad...how's that for a glowing endorsement). About half way through the movie, I suggest a little Dairy Queen. So I'm off to the local DQ in search of a couple blizzards. I pick up a Skor blizzard for myself and a Reese's peanut butter cup blizzard for my wife and I drive home as fast as I can [note: DQ blizzard's melt like a bastard if you have the heat on in your car]. It's about 9:30 when I get home. Once we finish the movie and the blizzards, it's about 10:30 and I'm ready to play. I grab a beer and fire up the laptop.

At this point, I'm mistakenly thinking:

  1. It's Friday night so the fish will be out.
  2. I'm a much better player than I was last time I played at Absolute Poker.
Boy was I wrong on both counts. After two hours and three beers, I was down $40 - another 20 BB lost. I cleared $10 of bonus in that time, but with a -8.36 BB/100, I needed a whole lot more bonus money.

So what went wrong? I still don't have the whole hand converter thing going, but there were 6 hands that I terribly misplayed. The problem I run into at Absolute more than any other site has to do with the players not protecting their hands or completely misrepresenting the strength of their hands. I don't mean that they are being tricky, per se. These players are giving up value bets in order to do what? Trick me? Good job bastards! Enjoy the extra money you get when I bet the river and you call with the nuts. Makes me crazy!

I'm going to post a bunch of losing hands below. I'd post my good hands, but there weren't any. Without further ado, here a few hands typical of my play on Friday:

Hand 1: What are the odds?
STAGE #205334573: HOLDEM NORMAL $1/$2 - 2005-10-14 23:10:32 (ET)
MRZ1963 - Posts small blind $0.50
JEANROYCE - Posts big blind $1
*** POCKET CARDS ***
Dealt to HERO [As 2d]
SEMPER__FI - Folds
PGBETZ - Folds
RF7890 - Folds
CHUNKELUVR53 - Folds
GRIDHUSKER - Folds
SLUGSPIT - Folds
HERO - Raises $2 to $2 (Going for a steal - Ax is pretty good heads up)
MRZ1963 - Folds
JEANROYCE - Calls $1
*** FLOP *** [Ac 5h 5c]
JEANROYCE - Bets $1
HERO - Raises $2 to $2 (Here, I'm thinking I've got it...)
JEANROYCE - Calls $1
*** TURN *** [Ac 5h 5c] [2h]
JEANROYCE - Bets $2 (Now I'm worried...)
HERO - Calls $2
*** RIVER *** [Ac 5h 5c 2h] [10h]
JEANROYCE - Bets $2
HERO - Calls $2 (Crying call...)
*** SHOW DOWN ***
JEANROYCE - Shows [7h 5d] (Three of a kind, fives)
HERO - Mucks
JEANROYCE Collects $15.75 from main pot

Seriously, who calls a raise with 75 offsuit? Sure, I'm trying to steal - but that doesn't mean that you should make your stand with a trash hand. Bob Ciaffone says that a player's true hand strength is displayed on the turn. When JeanRoyce raised my bet on the turn, I knew I was beat. But why not re-raise on the flop with trip 5s? Either I have a hand or I don't - why not find out for sure? If he re-raises me and I call, he knows that I probably don't have a five. Why did I call the raise on the turn? Cuz I suck, that's why.

Hand 2: Man do I suck...

STAGE #205346276: HOLDEM NORMAL $1/$2 - 2005-10-14 23:27:59 (ET)
Table: CHARLESTON (Real Money) Seat #6 is the dealer
JEANROYCE - Posts small blind $0.50
SEMPER__FI - Posts big blind $1
Dealt to HERO [Jh 9h]
FONEGUY - Calls $1
RF7890 - Folds
CHUNKELUVR53 - Folds
GRIDHUSKER - Folds
HERO - Calls $1
MRZ1963 - Folds
JEANROYCE - Folds
SEMPER__FI - Checks
*** FLOP *** [Qh 8s 4c]
SEMPER__FI - Checks
FONEGUY - Checks
HERO - Bets $1 (I'm on the button - so I'll take a stab at it)
SEMPER__FI - Calls $1
FONEGUY - Folds
*** TURN *** [Qh 8s 4c] [Qs]
SEMPER__FI - Checks
HERO - Bets $2 (Here I'm trying to represent that I have top pair now turned trips...)
SEMPER__FI - Raises $4 to $4
HERO - Raises $4 to $6 (This is just flat-out gay! I should have folded to the raise! WTF!?)
SEMPER__FI - Calls $2
*** RIVER *** [Qh 8s 4c Qs] [6c]
SEMPER__FI - Bets $2
HERO - Folds
*** SHOW DOWN ***
SEMPER__FI - Does not show
SEMPER__FI Collects $18.75 from main pot

This has got to be one of the worst hands I have ever played. A little rule of thumb: if a guy raises your bet on the turn and you're bluffing, your best bet is to fold. If the player is known to make moves and be tricky, then call the raise. The worst possible move to do no matter the case is to re-raise...I think the beer was getting to me. And I was probably on tilt too...

Hand 3: Why do I keep bluffing?

STAGE #205316270: HOLDEM NORMAL $1/$2 - 2005-10-14 22:44:02 (ET)
MRZ1963 - Posts small blind $0.50
MUGGSY12 - Posts big blind $1
*** POCKET CARDS ***
Dealt to HERO [Ks Qh]
CDT10111 - Folds
HERO - Calls $1
GARYTHETARD - Folds
GINFAR2005 - Folds
SEMPER__FI - Folds
HOLDEM HARRY - Folds
MRZ1963 - Folds
MUGGSY12 - Checks
*** FLOP *** [Js 2d 2h]
MUGGSY12 - Checks
HERO - Checks
*** TURN *** [Js 2d 2h] [7c]
MUGGSY12 - Bets $2
HERO - Raises $4 to $4 (WTF?!)
MUGGSY12 - Calls $2
*** RIVER *** [Js 2d 2h 7c] [3h]
MUGGSY12 - Checks
HERO - Bets $2 (Worst...play...ever!)
MUGGSY12 - Calls $2
*** SHOW DOWN ***
HERO - Shows [Ks Qh] (One pair, twos)
MUGGSY12 - Shows [9h 7h] (Two Pairs, sevens and twos)
MUGGSY12 Collects $14 from main pot

Two major things wrong here...First off, if you're going to raise a turn bet by a player in the hopes that he/she wil fold, you better have bet the flop as well! Now, I was hoping that he'd think I had pocket 2s in this case, but there is one problem with this: most low limit players do not consider cards other than their own. When I raise, Muggsy's probably thinking, "Hmmm - I guess we both have a pair of 7s...let's go to the showdown and find out". The second terrible play in this hand was betting on the river...Did I honestly think Muggsy was going to fold for one more bet on the end? I deserved to lose this one!

And so ends my beer-and-ice-cream-fueled Friday night $1/$2 session. I was now at -55 BB at $1/$2...would Saturday be any better?

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